What Meltdowns Look Like

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Before I get into this post, I want to make it very clear that I’m not going to be disclosing what any meltdown looks like. Seriously, that’s not important.

After talking to a friend of mine about being stressed from regular meltdowns, I sent a message to another friend. “What do you think many people think when they hear you say your kid is having a meltdown?” I’ve been thinking about it all day. And the conclusion I came to is that it doesn’t matter what they think.

I don’t want people to think about my children at their worst. I don’t want them to think about that because then that becomes their baseline. I was telling my husband before Spring Break began last week that I don’t want to expect a meltdown.. That the expectation ends up becoming the norm. And that’s not what I want for my kids’ future.

So what do meltdowns look like? Meltdowns look like a student who is not being supported. Meltdowns look like the outward manifestation of stress. Meltdowns look like fear of the next one. And over the course of Spring Break, we went from several a day, to one a day, to minutes per day, to none per day.

And while in the aftermath, everyone is drained and tired and feeling guilt… Emotions are high and regulation goes out the window…. It’s so important to remember that just because you see your child on their worst day does not mean that there are no better days ahead. And it doesn’t matter what other people think has been happening as long as you’re doing your best to take care of yourself. (Which honestly, that last part is where I’ve been slipping. Because recognition and regulation suck on my good days, let alone my bad.)

Photo by the_gman

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1 Response

  1. Alison says:

    Well said. My daughter is 30 and after all the ups and downs of life with her (I can already see that I don’t need to go into detail with you) , I’m realizing that it will do me good to share with other parents who truly understand. A little self-care!

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