Support Groups, Meetups, and Social Gatherings
Last night, I decided to go to an Asperger’s support group. It’s for both adults with and parents of. I was 5 minutes late because we had quite the rain last night, as such, traffic was bad coming home after picking my husband up from work. But I went nonetheless.
I’ve gone to another group that I don’t feel really meets my needs. I continue to go to it, because I feel like some of the younger Aspies could use a role model, even if I’m female. But last night was different. The adults with that were there were mostly my functioning level. Though, I can tell that their major perservation is not the study of ASDs.
One of my biggest ‘obsessions’ is definitely studying ASDs, both for kids with any form of Autism and adults who are more independent. I was responding to everyone’s concerns with my thoughts and ideas. And as I explained more and more, I was drawing more attention on myself. Finally, a ‘mother of’ looked at me and asked who I was and why I was there. It was pretty scary. While I didn’t mind the attention when I was responding, the thought of having to explain myself, even for a good reason, was petrifying.
I think I looked like a typical Aspie last night. I tend to not in day to day things, but when you get me in large groups like that, I don’t exactly know what to do. So I was sitting on the floor (all the chairs and couches were taken), not making eye contact, or even face contact, rocking back and forth, and writhing my hands. When I went to speak, I did so in a stutter until I knew it was truly my turn to speak.
I plan on creating (and have a meeting to discuss this tomorrow) a meetup for ASD adults. Nothing as formal as last evening. Definitely not like the other group. But just something to get together and talk or eat or play games. I don’t have the energy to create something that was structured like last night. The event alone was overwhelming and I had to take a good 15 min after it ended to calm down enough to drive in the car.
It’s also something I’ve been working on in therapy. I was to be able to push those boundaries. Where I’m comfortable without feeling so tense. Do any of you have any tips on how you get through those events?
I will say, out of all the ‘adults with’, I was the only one that expressed having children. Quite a few expressed not being in relationships. And others were working or attempting to find a job which seemed to mean they weren’t looking for a relationship. There was a couple there with one partner that is AS. It seemed to be fairly distributed independence levels.