Stop Making Your Child Suffer

This is for allistic parents of autistic kids who are trying to follow the Neurodiversity paradigm.

We’ve said it over and over.. Behavior is communication. Behavior is communication. Behavior is communication. You’ve gotten the message. Except, you’ve missed what we’re saying. Don’t extinguish behavior because it’s communicating an autistic kid’s needs, yes….but….

Over and over, I see you. I see you saying that behavior is communication and allowing your kid to continue communicating with meltdowns. Meltdowns are the rawest form of communication. It is the communication we use when we have nothing else to communicate with. Stop doing this to your child.

Communicating through meltdowns is traumatic for your autistic child. It is exhausting to your autistic child. It is what happens after they try and try and try to find a way to communicate and then out of pure desperation, meltdown.

Instead, you should be doing more. You have to give them a way to communicate that works for them. Watch and listen to the other ways they communicate. You must give them a way to not get to the point that the only thing that gets their point across is a meltdown. No autistic child or person likes having a meltdown. No autistic person likes having their needs not listened to.

It’s true, behavior is communication. You don’t need to extinguish behavior. But please recognize, just because your child is autistic, it doesn’t mean that meltdowns are an autistic way of communicating. It is a measure of last resort communication only after our autistic ways of communicating have failed. So stop delaying giving your child a way to communicate. Please. I beg of you. Stop making your child suffer.

Photo by Mingo.nl

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